Notes and Clarifications

Die Rolling

True story. Phil and I were playing World in Flames with a clown we never played before. As the Germans, he started out by announcing a series of really stupid and risky attacks, they needed a '5' to succeed. Well, all three attacks worked, rolling the '5' every time. This went on for several sessions. In a clutch situation, he always rolled the '5'. But since we had about 20 dice to choose among, nothing struck us funny. One time while Clown was answering the phone, I was talking to Phil and fiddling with the dice. I just happened to notice that one of them had all '5's! Even so, I needed more proof before accusations could be made; remember most wargamers have a set of 'funny' dice and this might be a true accident. So when he came back and resumed moving, I innocuously moved the dice off the map area along the edge and spreading them out. Now for the test. When his movement was over and started his attacks, he specifically looked for this die and had to make an effort to stand up, walk around the table and get it. Not only did he know about this die, he went out of his way not to bring it to our attention. He then rolled it, of course getting a '5'. That was proof I needed. We confronted him, called hooey on the game, vowed not only never to play him again but we would spread the word around about him in Houston gaming circles.

Ask us about other amusing stories of this loser. We can tell you about his personal hygiene, why it always snowed in England whenever he was nearby and I still want to know why he never let his little girl use the bathroom.


Chincey Dice Rollers

This is the opponent that doesn't really roll the dice but rather places them in his hand and let them drop straight down. At tourneys I usually insist that dice be rolled in at least a box. After playing one of these dogs, I and a friend sat down and tried duplicating the practice. In less than 15 minutes we found we could 'roll' ones half the time. Do these pinheads really think they are getting away with something?


Lawyer Accuser

This guy, when you don't agree with him or use a rule he didn't know, makes the hasty accusation that *you* are the rules lawyer and you're bending the rules to suit your purposes. In 95% of these cases, the guy is clearly wrong but is so much of a pinhead he won't admit it. Be *very* skeptical when someone calls you this first.

True story. One guy I played, attempted a To Hit process on a gun on a hill. I claimed Height Advantage +1 (all that was needed for him to miss). In a girly-man type of hissy fit, he argued that it applied only to infantry, that's why it is called "infantry height advantage, it applies only to infantry; infantry height advantage - get it?" When I reached for the rule book to double check this, he argued "You're not going to look this one up too? You waste everyone's time when you know you're wrong." No, mullethead, the rule is simply 'Height Advantage' applying both to the TH or IFT DR. In short he was wrong, knew it, but tried bullying me into acquiescing.


Mr. KnowItAll

This professor knows all the rules all the time without looking anything up. While there are some truly sharp people out there, I am always cautious of the guy that does this. It's easy to spot them: just look up some of the rules he claims he knows. They are either wrong or right. My guess is, they are usually wrong in their favor. Please note, I am not accusing them of cheating because often they are sincere in their beliefs. But keep in mind that a close group of people tend to learn rules among themselves will play that way. That's why tourneys are so fun, you get to meet other interpretations and styles of play.



I understand face-to-face opponents are hard to do sometimes and PBEM may be the next best thing. But for me it is a far second. The single aspect I don't like is the die rolling: letting the opponent tell you what the die rolls are. The obvious conclusion here is that I am accusing everyone of cheating. While that possibility is always present, that's not why I dislike it. Quite the opposite, it reduces the enjoyment I get from the game. The fun of die rolling is pulling snake-eyes at that one critical moment, or boxcars when your opponent opens up his big gun. I would feel bad if I actually had to tell someone I rolled a game-winning CH on the last turn. In person, that's the stuff tales are made of and you can't wait to tell your beer-swilling buddies. Honestly, I would be skeptical in the reverse situation. It just is not fun for me and I would rather not be in that situation if I can avoid it. What the game needs is a third person telling doing all the die rolls.